Boat Porn: Fantasies of cheating on your boat

[Magneto]

I have recently found myself to be a trawler person. I like going slow but it wasn’t always that way. I used to dream of fast ones racing across oceans, planning on top of the waves, leaving the slow ones in my wake. I fantasized about this one for the longest time. Kind of like a Farrah Fawcett poster when we were kids. (My favorite part is at 1:20).

AB 100 - AB Yachts - NEXT Yacht Group

I wanted fast girls like this and found plenty. The internet is full of them. High maintenance and constantly asking for more money. I dreamed about showing up at marinas and events with such a flashy lady. Two water jets powered by 3800HP, speeds of 54 knots, what young pup wouldn’t have a poster of this on their wall? Then I grew up and the fantasies became … well more conventional.

My taste became a little more mature but still exotic. I liked speed but also enjoyed class. The Italian’s have a classy look outside but everyone can agree that what’s inside is just as important as what’s outside.

Now at my age and wisdom, I have to admit … I like mature boat porn. I find we have more in common. We like to do the same things. Neither one of us is in a big hurry so we like to take it slow, smell the roses. I like big bows and I cannot lie. I like ladies with long range endurance. Ones built like a brick @#$% house. Ladies like this:

https://www.boattrader.com/listing/...edition-103014695/?refSource=enhanced+listing




Sure at 220 tons, she’s a bit on the heavy side but she’s a looker.

 

[Gordon J]

Bilf

I guess the last one qualifies as a TILF? (Trawler i'd like to float)

 

[RT Firefly]

 

[OldDan1943]

My ideal trawler/tug is less than mid 40s and greater than mid 30 ft.
My documented 2008 AT34 fits the bill for a couple, at some point and for some reason the same boat is now documented as a 36. The mid 40s, 2 stateroom, 2 head is good for 2 couples. Both single engine.
I guess I am old fashion, I expect a trawler to look like a trawler or tug. Just a personal preference.

 

[syjos]

I was a relief captain on a 90' Italian fast yacht like the ones in your pictures. This was back in the 90's in the PNW.

I did not enjoy driving the boat at speed. With the raked windshield and low ceiling, I had difficulty seeing out the windshield. At speed, avoiding pieces of floating wood and logs was nerve racking. I had to rely on a deckhand looking forward with binoculars to call out debris warnings.

The boat put up a huge wake at speed so there was a lot of maneuvering required to stay away from other boats to reduce the effect of our wake. The owner was an A hole so he wanted to cruise at top speed as soon as we left port and became agitated when I slowed down or changed course to avoid waking other boats.

One time, we were cruising around Seattle on a Sunday when the owner said the family wanted to eat pizza. The only place with pizza within walking distance and a dock big enough for a 90 footer was either La Conner, Friday Harbor or Olympia. The owner picked Friday Harbor and we sped at top cruising speed to Friday Harbor.

We got to Friday Harbor in less than two hours. While the owner and family were at the pizza restaurant, the deckhand spent the whole time refueling! The family returned and off we went back to the home slip. I don't remember how much fuel we took on but it was a very expensive pizza!

 

[GFC]

Hi, my name is Mike and I don't own a trawler. And I'll add that, while I like the looks of a lot of trawlers they just don't light my fire like the boat I now have. I usually cruise at about 9-10kts which is my hull speed (~900 rpm's) but at times I do like to get up on plane. The boat cruises nicely at 17-22kts on plane and that's plenty fast for me.


If I was ever going to cheat on my boat here's what she would look like:

Now, back to our regularly scheduled boat porn programming.

 

[oscar]

When I retire in 2022 I will have 36 years under my belt in the same job. 36 years of too much to tell you here good, bad, and ugly. I won't miss it. The only thing I will miss is some of the people and the moment you hit "auto throttles" and 450,000 pounds of airplane comes to life and muscles its way to somewhere in the high 100's mph and slowly gets up in the air.

When we get the boat in the next two years it will be a boat that chugs along nicely at 8-9 knots for however many years we can have our health and enjoy the waterways.

But it will also have enough under its belts that once in a while I'll look at my lovely bride and say "lets clean them out" and she will get comfortable and I will put the throttles forward and the 8V71's or 92's will come alive and push 60,000 pounds of 1970's fiberglass and solid wood cabinets on the step for a few..... Until I hear the screams from my wallet and pull them back again......

Yes slow is good. But once in a while fast is fun.

To the OP..... that's a nice piece of boat porn.

 

[Olebird]

Is it Spring yet? Cabin fever is really bad today!

 

[rgano]

If I was ever going to cheat on my boat here's what she would look like:

Now, back to our regularly scheduled boat porn programming.

Hi Mike. I helped my father build an 18-foot mahogany runabout which looked just like that one. He installed a marinized 100 HP Ford V8, I think a 1936 flathead. He was inspired by boats he saw as a poor Depression-era kid looking at the rich people running those things on Illinois lakes. It was beautiful with the white grout lines between the highly varnished deck planks.

For me, this was always "boat" porn, able to cross oceans at speed, and leap tall buildings.... My first ship, and the vague land astern was not a friendly place.

 

[OldDan1943]

Is it Spring yet? Cabin fever is really bad today!

Go down and sit on the boat.

 

[Toki]

Careful with that boat porn stuff folks! It can lead to infidelity and separation.

Like most sailors, I perused ads for nicer, flashier sailboats than my own. Every now and then, when none of my sailor friends were looking and when I didn't think I'd get caught, I'd have a glance at the powerboat sections. Yes, I felt dirty and guilty, but it wasn't a problem right? I could quit any time I wanted, right? WRONG! Sailboat is now sold and I'm thoroughly enjoying my new (to me) tug. Sure, my sailor friends have lost all respect for me, and I feel bad about that ... for just a little while ... as I speed by them and snag that choice anchorage hours before they arrive!

 

[Art]

Porn:

Television programs, magazines, books, video etc.; that are regarded as emphasizing the sensuous or sensational aspects of a nonsexual subject and stimulating a compulsive interest in their viewing audience.

Thus - "Boat Porn"

We're very satisfied with the "boat porn" times that our boats and other boats provide us when aboard or otherwise viewing marine items!

 

[RT Firefly]

Greetings,
Mr. A. I think you had better invest in a new dictionary.


pornography (n.)1842, "ancient obscene painting, especially in temples of Bacchus," from French pornographie, from Greek pornographos "(one) depicting prostitutes," from porne "prostitute," originally "bought, purchased" (with an original notion, probably of "female slave sold for prostitution"), related to pernanai "to sell" (from PIE *perə-, variant of root *per- (5) "to traffic in, to sell") + graphein "to write"

 

[Art]

Greetings,
Mr. A. I think you had better invest in a new dictionary.


pornography (n.)1842, "ancient obscene painting, especially in temples of Bacchus," from French pornographie, from Greek pornographos "(one) depicting prostitutes," from porne "prostitute," originally "bought, purchased" (with an original notion, probably of "female slave sold for prostitution"), related to pernanai "to sell" (from PIE *perə-, variant of root *per- (5) "to traffic in, to sell") + graphein "to write"

See how you are RT...

I was trying to keep this G rated for those who may be shy. LOL

We're talking Boat Porn ... not Sex Porn :lol:

 

[OldDan1943]

One US Congressman, when asked what constitutes porn responded with something similar to, "I know porn when I see it."

 

[BandB]

I have recently found myself to be a trawler person. I like going slow but it wasn’t always that way. I used to dream of fast ones racing across oceans, planning on top of the waves, leaving the slow ones in my wake. I fantasized about this one for the longest time. Kind of like a Farrah Fawcett poster when we were kids. (My favorite part is at 1:20).

AB 100 - AB Yachts - NEXT Yacht Group

I wanted fast girls like this and found plenty. The internet is full of them. High maintenance and constantly asking for more money. I dreamed about showing up at marinas and events with such a flashy lady. Two water jets powered by 3800HP, speeds of 54 knots, what young pup wouldn’t have a poster of this on their wall? Then I grew up and the fantasies became … well more conventional.

Wifey B: I'm polygamous when it comes to boats and they all know it so it's not cheating and this is the type I love. Viareggio, February 3. I've been on a couple of AB's and love them.

I read what Syjos wrote but haven't experienced that on the AB's I've been on. Did experience it on one boat, when Hatteras put lower helms on an 80 or 100 and the windshield really was sloped plus reflective and just bad all around.

 

[BandB]

One US Congressman, when asked what constitutes porn responded with something similar to, "I know porn when I see it."

I remember this story from a DA. He had just taken office when "I am Curious (Yellow)" came out. I believe that was the one, first x-rated to hit mainstream theaters and the movie that led to the Supreme Court decision of "Redeeming Value." Now, Doug's office was receiving many calls protesting it being shown at the Janus Theater. He, personally, had no interest in getting involved and wasn't going to consider involving the city in an expensive situation. However, he had an older assistant who was very bothered by it so he sent Ross to respond to the complaints.

Well, Ross appeared on television, on the 11 o'clock news. Here's what he said, "I have been to see I Am Curious Yellow 3 times and become more convinced each time that it's obscene."

Now, the theater owner had fun with that asking who kept dragging him back. Sort of like those who call in to talk radio to complain about how dirty the show is and point out many things over many days so the host asks if his radio doesn't have buttons or a dial.

 

[Art]

Split personality

 

[O C Diver]

Now at my age and wisdom, I have to admit … I like mature boat porn. I find we have more in common. We like to do the same things. Neither one of us is in a big hurry so we like to take it slow, smell the roses. I like big bows and I cannot lie. I like ladies with long range endurance. Ones built like a brick @#$% house. Ladies like this:

https://www.boattrader.com/listing/...edition-103014695/?refSource=enhanced+listing




Sure at 220 tons, she’s a bit on the heavy side but she’s a looker.

I pass this vessel 2 or more times a year in Portsmouth, VA. From sea level, it's drop dead gorgeous!

Ted

 

[Codger2]

Hi, my name is Mike and I don't own a trawler. And I'll add that, while I like the looks of a lot of trawlers they just don't light my fire like the boat I now have. I usually cruise at about 9-10kts which is my hull speed (~900 rpm's) but at times I do like to get up on plane. The boat cruises nicely at 17-22kts on plane and that's plenty fast for me. .

That pretty much sums up my choice in boats!

 

[Art]

That pretty much sums up my choice in boats!

Ditttttoooo!

 

[BaltimoreLurker]

One of my neighbors built this from scratch. Started in 2005, just brought it to the yard yesterday. The steering wheel is from a Model T.

 

[Art]

A Beauty! Engine type/size/hp?

 

[GFC]

Lurker, that is one beautiful piece of art. I posted a photo above of an old Chris but the one model they made that really makes the old heart pitter pat a little faster is this particular model. It's the 1955 Continental with the bull nose bow. That is a true thing of beauty.

Ahhhhh, I think I need a cigarette and a nap.

 

[BaltimoreLurker]

A Beauty! Engine type/size/hp?

140HP, don't know the make. But he said he couldn't get a carburated version, had to get FI. So, no Holley's on top.

 

[oceancrosser]

When I retire in 2022 I will have 36 years under my belt in the same job. 36 years of too much to tell you here good, bad, and ugly. I won't miss it. The only thing I will miss is some of the people and the moment you hit "auto throttles" and 450,000 pounds of airplane comes to life and muscles its way to somewhere in the high 100's mph and slowly gets up in the air.

I just retired after 40 yrs and 6 months of doing the same as you. After spending a lifetime of doing 8 miles a minute and now I truly enjoy the sweet pace of 8 miles an HOUR. I can get up and "hit the head" without getting a babysitter to watch the "other guy/gal" and pull over when I want to enjoy the scenery!


Like they say.. I miss the clowns but not the circus.


Travel safe,


Rusty


P.S. 450K.. must be a light twin, we usually left at 870K when I engaged the auto throttles!

 

[RonR]

Were still on the fence. I like the looks/performance of the Egg Harbor, but would like a bit more room and about 15-20 years newer. We are making plans to go up a size in 2 years or so, not sure if we are going to look for another Sport fisher in the 38-42 range like a Hatteres, Viking or Egg Harbor, or if were going to go up to a 40-45' trawler like a Ocean Europa. Trying to make it all work on getting a covered slip that fits a bigger boat, the cost of the boat... you guys know the deal.

 

[Art]

Were still on the fence. I like the looks/performance of the Egg Harbor, but would like a bit more room and about 15-20 years newer. We are making plans to go up a size in 2 years or so, not sure if we are going to look for another Sport fisher in the 38-42 range like a Hatteres, Viking or Egg Harbor, or if were going to go up to a 40-45' trawler like a Ocean Europa. Trying to make it all work on getting a covered slip that fits a bigger boat, the cost of the boat... you guys know the deal.

IF - You can get covered slip to fit your needs... I much recommend doing so.

IMHO, a covered slip's added cost far outweighs the cost of open slip natural elements degradation on a boat's outside and inside portions.

 

[RonR]

IF - You can get covered slip to fit your needs... I much recommend doing so.

IMHO, a covered slip's added cost far outweighs the cost of open slip natural elements degradation on a boat's outside and inside portions.

We keep the 33' in a covered slip, and are on the wait list for a 40' covered slip but I think it will be a year or so before we get to move.

 

[FlyWright]

I just retired after 40 yrs and 6 months of doing the same as you. After spending a lifetime of doing 8 miles a minute and now I truly enjoy the sweet pace of 8 miles an HOUR. I can get up and "hit the head" without getting a babysitter to watch the "other guy/gal" and pull over when I want to enjoy the scenery!
...
P.S. 450K.. must be a light twin, we usually left at 870K when I engaged the auto throttles!

I've often said the same thing! I love 8 miles per hour now but it took a while to adjust to the idea that it takes 2 hrs to go 15NM ...which is the approximate circumference of a 360 degree standard rate turn in the jet at cruise speed.

I also can have much more fun with my boat when the engines are not operating than I could ever have with the Learjet 60 when the engines are not operating...a REAL 'lightweight' airplane compared to the behemoths you guys flew!

If 450K is a light twin, then a LJ60 is an ultralight.